i spent enough time blaming the wrong people, namely myself.
it's about time i laid out justice
where justice is due.
freeing myself from self-imposed punishments and beatings.
clearing my mind of inadequacies
and what might have beens.
what might have been is i could be worse off.
you never think of it that way - that the alternate could be bad.
that the might've been you've been dreaming of is what you're actually living.
i'm starting to think of it all that way.
that this is what i hoped for
when i fell asleep smiling
and what i had to tear myself awake from.
i spent enough time imagining the other
when i should have lived the now.
a self-imposed punishment of greener pastures.
a corporal punishment of gazing too hard through the looking glass.
it's about dishing out due justice
justice to this world,
this life i'm living.
it's about taking the blame off of myself
and replacing it with praise.
what might have been has nothing
on what is.